Not the Me People want Me to Be

I was reading a blog just now in my friends blogspot, and I decided I'd post some poems every now and then that I made back in my grade school years. I'm no Robert Frost or Shakespeare, since I like writing poems that are actually pretty literal and not a pain in the ass to analyze. Anyways, enjoy.

Myself

Living my life as another lie
Why do I feel this way
I watch the still world go by
I hope I'll find the real me someday
I watch the sun gleaming through
The lonely mountains apart
How can there be an ending
If there never was a start
I wonder what has become of me
The world the stars the sun
Looks down in empty expression
How can this be undone
I stand in the cliff in the middle of the forest
With the silence of the wind I listen
With the sun shining on the lake below
As the light on the water glistens
I stand in wonder how my life belongs
In this place than the other
To stay in peace and never leave
Or be bothered by another
Asking myself who am I
And where in the world do I stay
But I'll keep looking all my life
Cause I will find myself someday

This poem was made probably 8th or 9th grade. I honestly can't remember specifically. But I know it's old. I guess you can say these were my dark days, like what every normal person goes through in their mid teen years. At least I dealt with it through poetry... not drugs.

I can't say the poem reflects who I am now. I'd say it kind of captures my struggle in my current life (college life sucks... and I don't feel like being a slave to the money... I want to be closer to nature.... complain complain complain) but I do however have figured out who I am. I guess you can say it slowly came to me when I met Joe and when I started living on my own, kind of, in college. So I know who I want to be now... I'm just going to throw tantrums until I can get out of this typical American assembly line. :]